Friday, September 15, 2006

Even Barbie scoops poop

I just saw a Barbie commercial for Barbie and Tanner, who is apparently Barbie's dog. It started out normally, with Barbie in some nice park setting, etc. All of a sudden, they show the dog pooping and Barbie scooping up the poop and disposing of it in a nearby tiny trash can. Is this a statement on the world today, as far as trying to teach kids something that should be common sense in the real world? Or has the fantasy of Barbie ended?

Can you imagine pitching this idea to the people at Mattel? Maybe it went a little something like this:
Guy 1: "Look guys. Barbie's been everywhere and done everything now. It's time to think outside of the box. What else can we do with her?"
Guy 2: "President of the Free World Barbie complete with Air Force 1."
Guy 1: "Nah, we all know a woman can't be president."
Guy 2: "Why not? They make less money than men, so we could save the nation a bunch of money right there!"
Guy 1: "She'd get PMS and take it out on the nation. Or worse yet, get pregnant and take maternity leave. Let's leave those kind of experiments to bigger, more progressive countries, like Sri Lanka or China."
Guy 2: "Fine. How about Trailer Trash Barbie and Wifebeater Ken? Trailer and skanky nightclub with stripper pole sold separately."
Guy 3: "Sex and the City Barbie with Emotionally Unavailable Ken. Complete with cigarettes, condoms, laptop, and limo. Barbie's friends and their diner hangout sold separately."
Guy 1: "Hahaha guys. Seriously..."
Guy 2: (Accidentally pokes his eye with a very sharp pen) "$h!t!"
Guy 1: "Brilliant! Barbie can shovel poop! I can't believe we've never thought of that before!"

All I know, is that my Barbie dolls were far too sophisticated to scoop poop. I mean, what if it got tracked into the dream house or the Ferrari? None of my Barbie dogs pooped. I mean, ick...it would like totally ruin Barbie's manicure and couture. Totally.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Barbie can’t scoop poop. I believe it’s anatomically impossible although I lack the dolls to prove this. Besides… if I saw Barbie scooping poop I think I’d run over and do it for her. 4ft high legs in the air like that. Ohh yeah.. I’d be there just to get a closer look.

Maybe I shouldn’t read your blog when I’m lit but honestly…. Who wouldn’t want to help out that pooper?

Author said...

Guy 3: "Sex and the City Barbie with Emotionally Unavailable Ken.

LOL!!!!!