How would you go about explaining that you are a scientist working on creating artificial penises? Can you imagine the introduction at a dinner party?
"Hi, I'm Randy. I create artificial penises for rabbits in a lab."
"Hi Randy. I'd shake your hand, but..."
It reminds me of that part in the movie Clerks where Dante and Randall are watching the high school guidance counselor perform the egg endurance test. A woman comes up to the counter and explains the odd behavior, then ends with, "It's important to have a job that makes a difference, boys. That's why I manually masturbate caged animals for artificial insemination."
Man, that movie had a plethora of great quotes...
Friday, May 26, 2006
Monday, May 22, 2006
Make English the official language of the US?
Sorry E. - I didn't see your question about this until today, as I've been pretty busy as of late. But here is my take on the argument against making English the official language of the US...
First, this link has the pros and cons of making English the official language of the US: http://immigration.about.com/od/ussocialeconomicissues/i/OfficlEngIssue_2.htm.
Personally, I don't think we need an official language, because it would be just one more way for people to discriminate against people of other cultures. The first point in that article that it would ease racial conflicts is just dumb; ebonics aside, black and white folk speak the same language and there are still plenty of conflicts.
And the second point is only partially true. Many immigrants, once they reach the US, do end up learning English, but it is a process and it doesn't happen overnight. The ones who don't learn the language are usually elder members of a family and they are part of an immigrant community in which there are native speakers who do learn English. Learning English is vital to an immigrant community, but not everyone in the community has to learn it.
As it is right now, it's not like we're doing a ton to help people along. It's not as though we have signs in other languages, or products in other languages (like Canada), or that we would have to provide an interpreter for someone interviewing for a job if they didn't speak English. English is already pretty much a requirement for people living in the US. The literature available in other languages is usually linked to services that serve a large immigrant population (such as classes, naturalization, etc.) or services that concern the health of individuals (hospitals, and such). I think that is reasonable even if we had English as the official language, because it would still be necessary for people who are just arriving here or even just traveling. Making English the official language wouldn't get rid of the need for those services altogether.
English classes should be free and accessible to those who want to learn. I find that most of the people who bitch and moan about immigrants are the very people who support legislation and tactics to undermine successful integration of immigrant communities. My mom (among many other people) recently had to fight a huge uphill battle when the Bush administration threatened to cut the majority of funding that they use to help immigrants learn English and to help adult students learn basic skills. Luckily that legislation didn't go through, but it was very close and would have been a death sentence to those programs. For background, you can check out: http://advocatesforabe.blogspot.com. (On a side note, by cutting that funding, they would have not only lost the ability to help immigrants but also native speakers who need help learning basic skills, such as English and math. How do we expect people to get off of programs, such as welfare, if they don't have the skills to do something that would make it worthwhile for them to get off of welfare?)
People in the US need to get their heads out of their asses and realize that we are citizens of a global community, and we should act accordingly. Helping people to learn a language so that they can be a successful part in our corner of the world should not be such a threat. I fear that making English the "official" language would just be an added excuse for people to discriminate.
First, this link has the pros and cons of making English the official language of the US: http://immigration.about.com/od/ussocialeconomicissues/i/OfficlEngIssue_2.htm.
Personally, I don't think we need an official language, because it would be just one more way for people to discriminate against people of other cultures. The first point in that article that it would ease racial conflicts is just dumb; ebonics aside, black and white folk speak the same language and there are still plenty of conflicts.
And the second point is only partially true. Many immigrants, once they reach the US, do end up learning English, but it is a process and it doesn't happen overnight. The ones who don't learn the language are usually elder members of a family and they are part of an immigrant community in which there are native speakers who do learn English. Learning English is vital to an immigrant community, but not everyone in the community has to learn it.
As it is right now, it's not like we're doing a ton to help people along. It's not as though we have signs in other languages, or products in other languages (like Canada), or that we would have to provide an interpreter for someone interviewing for a job if they didn't speak English. English is already pretty much a requirement for people living in the US. The literature available in other languages is usually linked to services that serve a large immigrant population (such as classes, naturalization, etc.) or services that concern the health of individuals (hospitals, and such). I think that is reasonable even if we had English as the official language, because it would still be necessary for people who are just arriving here or even just traveling. Making English the official language wouldn't get rid of the need for those services altogether.
English classes should be free and accessible to those who want to learn. I find that most of the people who bitch and moan about immigrants are the very people who support legislation and tactics to undermine successful integration of immigrant communities. My mom (among many other people) recently had to fight a huge uphill battle when the Bush administration threatened to cut the majority of funding that they use to help immigrants learn English and to help adult students learn basic skills. Luckily that legislation didn't go through, but it was very close and would have been a death sentence to those programs. For background, you can check out: http://advocatesforabe.blogspot.com. (On a side note, by cutting that funding, they would have not only lost the ability to help immigrants but also native speakers who need help learning basic skills, such as English and math. How do we expect people to get off of programs, such as welfare, if they don't have the skills to do something that would make it worthwhile for them to get off of welfare?)
People in the US need to get their heads out of their asses and realize that we are citizens of a global community, and we should act accordingly. Helping people to learn a language so that they can be a successful part in our corner of the world should not be such a threat. I fear that making English the "official" language would just be an added excuse for people to discriminate.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Good lord...help us please
I can't say that I'd be surprised if Jeb ran for president in 2008, but we're screwed if another person from this family leads our country. But then again, what do I know? According to shrub sr., Jeb would be "awfully good". So there we have it, folks...I think that "awfully good" should just about do it...
>:-p
>:-p
Odd headache remedies
I've dealt with headaches, including migraines, all of my life. Usually Ibuprofin takes care of my headaches and sometimes a good cold wash cloth on my forehead or the back of my neck feels good. Other than that, I've found very little that actually gets rid of a headache. When I was in middle school, I found out that I had an allergy to dairy products (cow dairy products, specifically), so I cut those out and things got a lot better.
Anyhoo, I found this article kind of interesting because people have all kinds of ideas about how to get rid of a headache or prevent them. I especially liked the line, "If your tresses were spread by the wind, stepped upon by a man or picked up by a bird and used in the construction of a nest, you could expect a headache." And coming in on a close second, "Wearing a tight hat was thought to bring on headache, although once the headache arrived, binding the head with something else—a red bandana, a blue kitchen towel, a hangman's noose—might be a potential cure."
Funny what people will think of...
Anyhoo, I found this article kind of interesting because people have all kinds of ideas about how to get rid of a headache or prevent them. I especially liked the line, "If your tresses were spread by the wind, stepped upon by a man or picked up by a bird and used in the construction of a nest, you could expect a headache." And coming in on a close second, "Wearing a tight hat was thought to bring on headache, although once the headache arrived, binding the head with something else—a red bandana, a blue kitchen towel, a hangman's noose—might be a potential cure."
Funny what people will think of...
Thursday, May 04, 2006
Drop in teen pregnancy due to lower sperm counts?
This article has some good food for thought. I don't know if I would have ever thought about the possibility of teen pregnancy being an indicator of fertility...
http://www.slate.com/id/2140985/?GT1=8190
http://www.slate.com/id/2140985/?GT1=8190
Why would anyone wear this?
Really...why? And why would Sarah Jessica Parker, of all people, wear this?
http://movies.msn.com/movies/Undressed?GT1=7701&photoidx=1
Ugh. I know that she wears some crazy stuff in Sex and the City, but the stuff she wears in everyday life tends to be much better. So, this is just inexplicable.
http://movies.msn.com/movies/Undressed?GT1=7701&photoidx=1
Ugh. I know that she wears some crazy stuff in Sex and the City, but the stuff she wears in everyday life tends to be much better. So, this is just inexplicable.
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